How to make a perfect meal

Cooking

Pick a subject. Any subject. Then get Tony Abbott to talk about it.

Then listen to him make a perfect meal of it.

In the last couple of weeks we’ve been treated to a couple of absolute gems to add to what has become a mile long list of ignorant or stupid statements. Each one more ludicrous than the last. The laughter from his revelation that Malcolm Turnbull invented the Internet in Australia had hardly died down when we were treated with this:

Opposition Leader Tony Abbott has poured scorn on Labor’s new plan to move to an emissions trading scheme one year early, describing an ETS as ”not a true market”.

”Just ask yourself what an emissions trading scheme is all about. It’s a so-called market in the non-delivery of an invisible substance to no one,” he said, when addressing reporters in Camden, in south-west Sydney, on Monday.

Unbelievable. But true to form. He should have learned back in July 2011 to keep his mouth shut after this ground-breaker: “It’s actually pretty hard to do this because carbon dioxide is invisible and it’s weightless and you can’t smell it.”

Science clearly isn’t his forté. Here’s my all-time science favourite: “Climate change is a relatively new political issue, but it’s been happening since the earth’s beginning. The extinction of the dinosaurs is thought to have been associated with climate change”.

I love these Abbottisms. A brief search of the internet reveals many more of them (and I’m sure whatever I find you’ve probably seen before anyway) but regardless of what you find I want you to consider what Penny Wong had to say yesterday: “I’d ask you to just pause for a minute and imagine Tony Abbott at an international meeting . . . “.

Think about it. Think long and hard about it.

Can you just imagine Tony Abbott with a microphone to the world? We’d be the laughing stock of the entire planet if we had a Prime Minister who made a perfect meal of everything he tried to talk about on the international stage. Abbottisms might be funny. Incompetence isn’t.

43 comments on “How to make a perfect meal

  1. Hi Michael

    Is TA ‘funny’ or ‘cringe-making’. I’m at the stage where I’m beginning to think the more fun is made of him, the more he can play the ‘victim’ of the Evil Left. Each of his idiotic brain snaps need to be discussed seriously and explained and critiqued deadpan so that listeners’ first reaction is not to mentally defend him. Just a thought…

    Patricia

  2. Bob Ellis,goes to town, as is this wont, on Tony’s latest proclamation. He makes an interesting observation:

    Though in some ways an intelligent, wily, likeable man he is in his heart an idiot, and it sometimes shows.

    So what does it mean to be “in his heart and idiot”? Or did Bob veer over the cliff on this one?

  3. Truthie, they showed this interview on ABC 24. When the cameras were flashed on to the two presenters they looked incredibly bored then the male said “We’ll leave it there” with buffoon Joe still fribbling away. I could not make head nor tail of what he was trying to say. Not that I was concentrating that much. 😆

  4. The really stupid thing about Abbott’s stupidity is that nearly all of what he says, including the very simplistic schoolyard like three word slogans are not original.

    Oh we know he’s coached and rehearsed, you see it as he struggles to drag up the remembered lines from amongst the brain farts trying to get out, and you see it when he’s asked something he hasn’t been rehearsed for. So it’s a gimme that his puppet masters and script writers are producing this idiotic stuff given to an idiot to regurgitate on cue. But even they, Abbott supposed brains trust, mostly plagiarise either US Tea Party gunk or UK conservative muck.

    Abbott’s latest gaffe on an invisible thing was lifted straight from a piece by Jeremy Warner, assistant editor of the arch conservative British daily The Daily Telegraph.

    Yet there are those who still want to vote in this lot, a deficient bunch who can’t even do opposition without copying someone else’s stuff, so it makes you wonder who they will copy their governance from?

  5. Jeremy Warner got it from Mark Schapiro Mö – HARPER’S MAGAZINE / FEBRUARY
    2010 (and attributes & links to the original in his piece in the Telegraph).

  6. OK Bacchus, the piece I read said Warner in the UK Tele.

    Still shows the fact there is nothing original in Abbott at all, actually there’s little in Abbott at all, only what’s put in there by his puppet masters and it appears his masters are as empty as he is.

  7. Yes of course Mö – that doesn’t change the contention of plagiarism by Abbott’s “controllers.” I just thought to correct the original source 😉

  8. What the fuck is your point scaper?

    And don’t tell me you honestly believe Abbott is clever enough to come up with a line line that, as stupid as that line was?

  9. And yet again in your eagerness for the gotcha, which is all that you seem to be about nowadays, is it was not MY allegation. It’s what’s being stated and reported and I came across.

  10. My point is you bullshit yet again when there is plenty of real stuff out there to confirm your twisted hatred of Abbott.

    You said: “Abbott’s latest gaffe on an invisible thing was lifted straight from a piece by Jeremy Warner, assistant editor of the arch conservative British daily The Daily Telegraph.”

    That is your daily lie!

    Actually, Abbott said pretty much the same thing on February 12, 2010.

    Abbott, February 12, 2010: That’s what his emissions trading scheme is about. It’s about the non-delivery of an invisible substance to no one and he wants to turn this into a $15bn-a-year market in Australia. I mean, really and truly.

  11. Yes Bacchus. Bishop blatantly plagiarised twice with material that was a decade old.

    Bishop in new plagiarism episode

    And of course this is not limited to the Liberals alone, at some point or another all parties, including the Greens and Indies, have lifted bits and pieces without attribution, but it’s the Liberals that take it to the top level, like Bishop plagiarising a whole section in her book without acknowledgement to the original author, or Abbott directly copying US Tea Party slogans and tactics, and now a UK writer’s statement.

    The entire Liberal party is one big copy that doesn’t want to change from its deep past and even their name is a copy of a progressive party one as they wanted to fool the voters when they started that they held progressive values.

    Yep, the Liberal Party, one big lie from start to end.

  12. You really do clutch at straws scaper in your desperation for gotchas.

    I repeated what’s being reported around the place, it’s not my lie. And it is not original for Abbott whether he said it back in 2010 or now.

    In fact that he repeats that nonsense a few years later is even more damning of him.

    Do you have the source for Abbott’s 2010 statement please, would like to read it in full?

  13. So Abbott’s minders lifted the original from Mark Schapiro in 2010 – it’s still plagiarism 🙄

  14. Yes Bacchus and then repeat the lifted line in 2013, which reinforces my original contention, neither Abbott nor his minders have anything original to offer, it’s all mindlessly aped from others.

  15. Virginia is in carbon tax denial but, whatever you call it, it’s still driving business offshore

    From: The Australian
    July 16, 2013 10:30PM

    Increase Text Size
    Decrease Text Size
    Print

    DESPITE La Trioli’s best efforts, even the PM knows a government slug when he sees one.

    Carbon tax denial. ABC 24 Breakfast, Monday:

    VIRGINIA Trioli (talking to opposition environment spokesman Greg Hunt): It’s not even a tax in the first place, how do you go on incorrectly calling it a tax . . . I don’t know how many times this morning I can say it’s not a tax but I’m just going to put it on the record just one more time and then viewers can make up their mind.

    Not listening to Virginia. James Grubel, Reuters yesterday:

    THE widely unpopular tax, blamed for rising electricity costs, was due to raise $8.14 billion in 2013-14 and $8.6bn in 2014-15.

    Even Rudd and the ABC call it a tax. ABC News yesterday:

    “Terminating” the carbon tax will cost the budget $3.8 billion . . . (Rudd) “The Government has decided to terminate the carbon tax. . . ”

    Whatever you call it, it still hurts. Marcus Priest, Australian Financial Review yesterday:

    BIG cement maker Adelaide Brighton. . . is unlikely to reverse a decision to shift operations overseas. . .

    New attack! Geoff Kitney, AFR yesterday:

    (ABBOTT’S) new line of attack is to argue that the market for carbon emissions is not a true market. An ETS, Abbott said, is “a so-called market in the non-delivery of an invisible substance to no one”. Run that by me again, Tony!

    New? ABC1’s 7.30, July 4, 2011:

    ABBOTT: Let’s face it. This is a very odd market. The non-delivery of an invisible product to no one. This is a market (that) has been very easily scammed overseas.

    Counter to the Liberal message pushed for years! Mark Kenny, The Sydney Morning Herald, yesterday:

    “JUST ask yourself . . . what an emission trading scheme is all about, it’s a market, a so-called market, in the non-delivery of an invisible substance, to no one.”. . . (This) runs counter to the message Liberals have been pushing for years.

    Counter to the message pushed for years? Abbott, February 12, 2010:

    THAT’S what his emissions trading scheme is about. It’s about the non-delivery of an invisible substance to no one and he wants to turn this into a $15bn-a-year market in Australia. I mean, really and truly.

    Abbott, March 19, 2010:

    THINK about it: the non-delivery of an invisible product to no one and Mr Rudd thinks he’s an economic genius.

    Abbott, Radio 2SM, May 31, 2011:

    NO, trading the non-production of an invisible product to no one. I mean, no wonder it’s been scammed so much in the European community and this is one of the many reasons why it’s just not a great idea.

    What would David say? Finance Minister Penny Wong, Monday:

    IMAGINE Tony Abbott at an international meeting talking to Barack Obama and David Cameron, both of whom believe in action on climate change, and telling them: “Look, this is just about the non-delivery of an invisible substance to no one.”

    What would David say? The Wall Street Journal, February 2, 2011:

    ONCE again, Europe’s emissions trading system has been beset by fraud and theft . . . Last year, the UN’s carbon market halted . . . when authorities discovered that the Hungarian government had — legally — been reselling allowances that had already been used. In 2009 . . . in certain countries, 90 per cent of the ETS’s trading volume was taken up by value-added-tax scams . . .

    (The ETS has) . . . been plagued by smaller thefts since its founding in 2005, and some companies in the Third World have spewed pollutants simply to . . . sell the carbon allowances to European companies . . . it’s in no one’s particular interest that (the ETS) work too well — not the businesses buying credits; not the governments, which would rather take the credit for being green without the economic costs of being too pure; and certainly not the fraudsters who have used the trading system to reap millions in profits.

  16. Have you got a link to the first Abbott statement please? I’m looking at the time lines of this and other copied statements he’s made.

  17. Might have to wait till after school hours Mö – 2SP obviously doesn’t know how to do links. Perhaps he “should of” listened at that expensive private school he allegedly attended 🙄

  18. Yes, what is your point Scaper?

    Möbius mentioned something Abbott’s plagiarism – which has been given wide currency on both the social and mainstream media – and you have a hissy fit over it. Not Abbott’s gaffe, but the fact Möbius mentioned it. 🙄

    You appear to be very protective of Abbott. Why?

  19. Migs, my point is that repty made a statement that was false. He claims Abbott used words from a certain source which is untrue. Asked for link to back it up and was finally provided with one of sorts. Unfortunately, Abbott has stated the same before the date on the linked piece. Also I have heard a similar phrase in 2009 at a function in Sydney and can not find the originator so there is no plagiarism as alleged by repty or anyone in the bubble that is the social media. Simple.

    Not defending Abbott as such…I detest repty and his untruths more than Abbott.

  20. For stuff’s sake scaper, it was not an untruth and just because you keep calling it that doesn’t make it true. By your standard I could turn around and say you are telling an untruth about my telling an untruth.

  21. He claims Abbott used words from a certain source which is untrue.

    I think if you look up Mobius acknowledged that when Bacchus corrected him scaper.

    And, as pointed out, it is not only sad that tabot repeats such stupidity rather than making his own up, but that he continues to repeat such stupidity years later.

  22. And, as pointed out, it is not only sad that tabot repeats such stupidity rather than making his own up, but that he continues to repeat such stupidity years later.

    That the point. Somehow scaper thinks because Abbott partly plagiarised something years ago, then repeats it doesn’t that doesn’t make him unoriginal. For mine it just reinforces his originality and lack of initiative.

  23. For mine it just reinforces his originality and lack of initiative.

    For me, it just re-enforces his complete stupidity

    But that’s just me 😉

  24. It also re-inforces that, while tabot said this three years ago, only now do hte media make something of it.

    Of course, it had nothing to do with the media’s personal inclination to the media slut rudd or the media contemptuous Gillard, does it? Could it ❓

  25. That should have been lack of originality and initiative.

    But yes Tom if you want to put it into basic terms.

  26. if you want to put it into basic terms.

    When talking about tabot, it’s probably best to “Keep It Simple S….”

  27. … and don’t forget the sadly laughable behaviour of both Sophie Mirabella and Julie Bishop on QandA

  28. Any evidence for all these businesses allegedly going offshore, scaper? Or is it more Liars bullshit?

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