Tony Abbott says some amazingly stupid things. His brain fart comments on gay people, women and climate change are some examples. Strolling around the internet I’ve managed to find some more pearls of wisdom that haven’t had the exposure of his more famous gaffes, and I happily present them here for your enjoyment.
Let’s start with this one:
The Opposition Leader said roads were critical to improving life across all facets of society.
“Better roads means better communities; better roads are good for our economy; they’re good for our society,” he said.
“They’re good for our physical and mental health.
“They’re even good for the environment because cars that are moving spew out far less pollution than cars that are standing still.”
So next time I feel a mental breakdown or the flu coming on I’ll visit a road. They are good for my health. We should all do it. Roads do good things for Australians.
I know what he was really trying to say, but let’s face it, he stuffed it up. This next one is a real gem:
Ever since I was old enough to understand the term, I have regarded myself as a conservationist. As a child, I used to play in the gullies and creeks surrounding the Lane Cove National Park. I wasn’t as careful then as now about protecting fauna, such as the red-bellied black snake, but I loved the bush for its potential for adventure and sense of solitude.In the valley behind our house, I first learnt to sleep under the stars. On canoeing trips, I learnt to read a map. On student bush walks, I developed a sense of direction.
As I said over at The AIMN, he no longer kills red-bellied black snakes and despises people who keep lights on. No wonder people such as Andrew Bolt rate him more credible than most of the world’s scientists. Scientists spend at least three years studying at university to become knowledgeable in their field. Tony Abbott reads maps. While floating down a river. How could you doubt him? How could you doubt a person who has a sense of direction because he walked in the bush yet needs a map to paddle a canoe?
This one is interesting:
Tony Abbott says he now has the “authority” to keep election promises. He admitted he had broken them in the past but said it was not his fault.
Well whose fault was it? Blame that ‘carbon tax’ I suppose.
I like this one:
Someone who’s earning $50,000 should be encouraged to move to $100,000.
Sounds fair enough to me. Tomorrow we’ll all line up to see the boss and ask for a $50K raise. Just tell him that Tony encouraged it (not that we’d need much encouragement).
This can’t be true:
Look, people should be polite to the Prime Minster. It doesn’t matter what they think of her policies or her government, they should be polite to her. That is the respect that the senior leadership of this country ought to be given and people certainly shouldn’t be disruptive of the Parliament.
Must be the new Tony we keep hearing about.
This is more like the old Tony:
Well, Kochie, I think the people of western Sydney want a plan, not a visit. They want a plan to ease cost of living pressures, a plan to ease traffic congestion and a plan to make the streets and community safer and the Coalition has real solutions to all these issues. We’ll build the WestConnex, we’ll end the carbon tax, we’ll stop the boats, we’ll stop the guns. Now, I think this is a big step forward for the people of Sydney.
Wow! How long have the boats been making it all the way to Western Sydney?
During a visit to Western Sydney (yes, the place where people shouldn’t visit) he said:
“We will bring in more trees and better soils, there will be incentives, not penalties and a green army for our degraded bushland and waterways under pressure”.
Where the hell are they going to pinch the trees from. Bring in from where? Maybe he’ll introduce a policy that all boat people have to bring a tree with them.
I’ll be going to the National Press Club tomorrow (31 Jan). I’ll take questions then. Joe Hockey and Christopher Pyne will be taking media queries this afternoon.
History shows us that he ran away from questions asked.
I really don’t think Abbott tries to be an idiot. It just comes naturally.