Our Antipodean Budget Process
Has rules as in the game of chess.
Tradition says he must make The Reply.
Can Tony do it and not tell a lie?
Could he perhaps have more success
By starting his speech with, “I confess
That unlike Swannie I’m no Grand Master.”
That might help him avoid disaster.
A compliment or two would show finesse,
Would help his image in the press.
But, no Chancellor of the Exchequer,
He decides instead to be a wrecker.
Aussies just don’t care for politesse.
He knows that! The best way to impress?
To shout and carry on about that tax!
It hurts us all! Who cares about the facts?
This was also a chance for him to obsess
About scandals and slime and Labor’s excess.
Slipper and Thomson! They’ve helped by stealth,
To destroy Australia and steal our wealth!
His reply speech worked, but nevertheless
Tony did regret the need for full day dress.
News offered help with their number jugglers.
If he could only’ve worn his budget speech smugglers!