Abbott A Prawn In Gillard’s Game?

Julia Gillard, no boxer, runner or athlete,
Is winning now, not just staying on her feet.
And it’s ‘ironman’ Tony Abbott , who’s a
Poor sport, on the ropes, a bad loser.

Crying “Foul!” he shouts out a portrayal
Of her latest ‘win’ as cheating, a betrayal
Of a parliamentary principle and rule,
Refusing to admit he’s been taken for a fool.

A self-promoting ‘star’ and champion,
Busy with his bike, stunts and triathalon,
He forgot his team and leader’s role,
Kicking, by Aussie rules, a spectacular own goal.

Yet he accuses Julia Gillard of poaching.
He won’t acknowledge his own poor coaching.
This year’s scores make clear his lack of skill;
Her two fifty goals to his side’s nil.

His pride and careless tactics caused it all
And pushed a weak team member to the wall.
No need for Gillard to plot or to conspire.
Outsider Slipper grabbed the chance to be umpire.

Now they’ve seen her bulldog perseverance,
Do selectors really need more clearance
Of her credentials, a further demonstration
Of this woman’s capacity to lead our nation?

If so, here’s proof she’s good at indoor games,
Like chess, where she can use her brains!
Look how she’s played the endgame of a Queen versus Pawn
And wiped out Tony Abbott,  for all his brawn!


The strangest feature of the Peter Slipper saga has been the astonishment with which the resignation of Harry Jenkins was received by the Opposition and the subsequent media furore over his being replaced by Slipper who was already Deputy Speaker.   As Laura Tingle says in her AFR article, the most balanced account of Slipper’s acessession to the speakership,……

Everyone had a theory. But the truth was blindingly simple. Ever since Slipper ratted on his own party and stood for deputy speaker back when Gillard was first elected, it was obvious he would accept the position of speaker.”

So why hadn’t Tony Abbott and Liberal Party heavies been on daily red alert to act to prevent such an outcome?    Why Did John Howard, supposedly a man of some political nous give such a glowing endorsement of Mal Brough, contender for Slipper’s seat of Fisher while in Nambour less than a week before the Slipper finally jumped ship on the Liberals?   Even Abbott himself had earlier encouraged Brough in his ambitions for a return to federal politics knowing that he lived in the electorate of Fisher.  

If politicians like  Tony Windsor were well aware way back in 2010 of Slipper’s ‘availability’  for the Speakership and the potential grief Abbott was attracting by his reneging on the pairing convention for Speaker why weren’t Coalition advisors and media commentators on their guard for the sort of scenario which eventually played out as a result of the tight numbers in the House of Reps and the antics there which were stressing out Harry Jenkins along with Slipper’s flagging loyalty to his party? 

Surely the National and Liberal party leaders together with Tony Abbott’s staffers should have been prepared to meet a range of contingencies which could arise, particularly after Slipper’s recent brazen parading of his friendship with Kevin Rudd on the very day of Howard’s appearance in Queensland with John Connolly and Brough.    Even we humble bloggers here at Cafe Whispers  were alert to it!

Tony Abbott!   What a prawn!

41 comments on “Abbott A Prawn In Gillard’s Game?

  1. This is too true not to repeat in full

    I’m just checking out the coverage of peter slipper’s dubious dealings over on the NEWS sites, and I have to say – I’m very impressed. I thought inquisitorial journalism was dead, but no. I’ve got a plan …

    … all we need, for all members of parliament to be scrutinised properly, is for each of them to cross the floor to join labor. One a week would do. And each, in turn, would be subject to the sort of front-page coverage that would otherwise be devoted to … well, whatever it is that the hun, tele, advertiser and so on devotes the front page to. Tits, I assume.

  2. patriciawa
    “The strangest feature of the Peter Slipper saga has been the astonishment”
    of the press the supposed INSIDERS. The fact that this “all happened” on the morning of the last sitting day has really upset the press. Instead of being able to look forward to partying the editors probably started shouting abuse. Hence the conspiracy theories of the journos to cover their own inept judgement. Sure they were surprised but why not just say it was an obvious outcome considering the political moves aimed at ousting Slipper. But then again that would have cast a bad light on Abbott, so instead the press writes articles casting Abbott as a victim.

    But you patriciawa have cast Abbott as just an odd crustacean..

    And a wonderful pome.

  3. Patricia, just a little bit of housekeeping..but do you have a link for that pic because I think that it might be copyright protected.

  4. Patriciawa, nice play on Dylan and very apt, ever since I saw that cartoon I have had a quiet chuckle going on at the back of my head, so why didn’t anybody who need too actually see it, did they all get caught up in their own self importance, maybe, His epitaph plain: Only a pawn in his own game

  5. Thanks, Min, my oversight. Done. But I also found that just clicking on the image seems to bring up the link, which I guess is another feature of the internet – one can’t pinch other people’s work that easily!

  6. patriciawa, a raw and very smelly prawn indeed. Great pome.

    I’m watching a rerun of QT and I’ve just spotted the PM giving Liealot a death stare, making Eyes Bishop look like an amateur.

    I really can’t understand how the Liars Party could have let the possibility of Slipper slipping through their fingers, slip their minds? Did they think they could keep white anting him without a reaction on his part?

    Slipper knew that he would not be pre-selected and had obviously decided not to go quietly, saving the Liars Party and its Liar in Chief, any embarrassment.

    Now, of course, they’re out to do a hatchet job on him, but I think they’ll be p*ssing in the wind-he’s only got 2 years to go and he can retire on a nice parliamentary pension and thumb his nose at the Liars Party.

    As for the hope that Mal Brough will fulfill their dream of regaining the throne, I think it will be another broken dream. Bwwahahahahahaha!

  7. Pingback: Abbott Reacts to Slipper Defection – Downfall Parody « No Place For Sheep

  8. Just for the record, Mr. Slipper is not under any investigation.

    The government and the Department are still looking at allegations made by a comrade of Mr. Slipper, from an adjoining electorate to see if a investigation is appropriate.

    We all know that Mr. Brandis, their chief legal adviser seems to have a view of the legal system, that many do not seem to share.

    Question? How does the Opposition know the NSW police are ready to move on Mr. Thompson. I would hate to think that the Opposition has access to the NSW police that others do not.

  9. The Slipper affair is rather like that Hitler story when the allies landed in Normandy and the front line generals wanted the panzars activated but the clique around the leader were too frightened to wake Adolf. Just like Abbort bad news is not welcome, hard questions ignored or just walk away. When his PPM drops to the mid 20’s his “Valkarie” will arrive but who will play Staffenberg.

  10. A pertinent point on a similar yet different subject but which can be applied here to our press being so totally blindsided by what we are now seeing as a quite obvious move.

    Author and journalist Joan Smith raised the point: how many important stories are being missed because these people are busy looking up women’s dresses?

    Yes, perhaps if the meeja weren’t so busy trying to fabricate a story of their liking, the news would just write itself.

  11. And to srive home the point, the oo has hit with this tatalizing headline

    Abbott to swoop as Victoria turns against Labor

    This is how the securing of Government votes is reported by the barrackers. Not only that, to add insult to injury

    according to private Liberal polling.


    I couldn’t even be bothered to do the google trick to read the fully ‘story’.

  12. CU, that “comrade” would be Alex Somlyay, I think. He was another Liar who was approached by the government to take the role of Speaker after the 2010 election.

    From memory, he was giving it serious thought, but I think they threatened to lock him in a small room with Eyes and he immediately fell into line.

    Apparently, Somlyay has been badmouthing Slipper in the local press almost on a weekly basis ever since he took the Deputy Speaker’s position. I can’t recall whether he had been asked to cease and desist, but obviously Slipper has taken all the “subtle” hints to heart, and jumped ship.

    Whether any pressure was put on harry Jenkins, I couldn’t say, but I think he’s the type of bloke who would put up a fierce resistance to coercion, but might be persuaded to take the hit for the good of the Party.

    OTOH, I have no reason to doubt that he might have been getting fed up with the appalling behaviour on the floor of the House and has decided to have a quiet 2 years as a back bencher. He did indicate that pokie reform was very close to his heart and he could quite possibly want to have ahand in forming the legislation.

    I thought Wilkie’s interview on Lopsiders was very informative. Cassidy tried his level best to get Mr Wilkie to badmouth both the PM and the government, but no dice. He said the PM had indicated that the government is committed to pokie reform and that she would uphold the commitment she had made to him.

    Bilko @ 8.22am, could we draw lots for the von Staffenberg role?

  13. Tom R @9.46am, with 2 more years of the Baillieu government to go before the feds go the the polls, I don’t think the Liars should be wetting themselves just yet.

    And once the compensation, higher tax free threshold and lower tax for small business (all of which Liealot will snatch away) and the increased super kicks in around 18 months before the next election, the punters will probably find a vote for the Liars Party is a lot less attractive.

    Once the punters have had their hands on the extra cash, I don’t think they’ll be too keen to have it ripped away from them and given to Big Mining.

  14. Also jane, does it not strike you as interesting that immediately after the opposition get their asses handed to them on a plate, their oracle run a big ‘scoop’ that is all based on information supplied by their chosen team.

    So when we have quotes like that offered up by Joan Smith, it’s not surprising really that they miss so much. What is surprising is when they actually land a story that is correct

    I guess, give a thousand monkeys a thousand typewriters (or something like that)

  15. Yes, Jane, I was very impressed with Wilkie’s straight and steady bat on Insiders on Sunday. He held his own very well in spite of Cassidy’s efforts to lead him astray and to say something suggesting even unease with the PM’s level of commitment to pokies reform.

    I particularly appreciated his comment that both Jennie Macklin and Julia Gillard were good hearted people who could be trusted. In fact all three of the Independents seem to have that opinion of our Prime Minister and they surely have more frequent and personal contact with her than is usual for most members of the House of Reps. Hearing unsolicited compliments like that from people of the calibre of Wilkie, Oakeshott and Windsor should have commentators worth their salt taking more note.

  16. Tom R

    I also could not be bothered reading past a headline, except for what the headline means. Abbott has to sure up his own position as Leader and can not take a break. The last party room meeting had the young guns standing up opposing him, to the point he declared meeting over and walked out. The 2 vocal protesters Vic, O’Dwyer, a Costello supporter, and NSW Fletcher.
    The headline confirms troubled times ahead for Abbott.

  17. Tom R 212.33pm, yes. I’m surprised that another leadership crisis hasn’t been on the front pages, because Kevin Rudd went to a different toilet or some such.

    As for a story which is correct, I still haven’t numbered the fingers of one hand, so I’m still waiting for a report which is factual, true, honest and has less holes in it than a genetically modified Swiss cheese.

    patricia, I was very impressed with the way Wilkie conducted himself. People keep dismissing him as a nutter, but I think he is just very passionate about the harm that pokie addiction is causing not just in his electorate, but everywhere and he wants to do something about it.

    Isn’t that the definition of a conviction politician? So admired by the Liars Party.

  18. Jane believe me, you do not get through Duntroon if you are a “nutter”. Right wing military conservative maybe, but Wilkie has seen the underbelly of people like Howard.
    He would know first hand what an extremist nut job looks like (Hitler, Mussolini, Pol Pot, Pinochet, Bush, Hiro Hito, Stalin, and the list goes on and on) so Abbott would have been easy to spot (not so for the MSM apparently).
    We dodged a bullet with both Latham and Abbott, but with Abbott the gun is still loaded and pointed at the head of Australia.
    Common Libs, put that loaded gun down and let’s talk about it.

  19. We dodged a bullet with both Latham and Abbott, but with Abbott the gun is still loaded and pointed at the head of Australia.
    Common Libs, put that loaded gun down and let’s talk about it.

    Love it.

  20. 2353, the ‘How To’ tab on the top of the page has some great tips on working with WordPress. We can thank Bacchus for most of the stuff.

  21. Jane at 0954
    “could we draw lots for the von Staffenberg role?”, count me in but I will need a long timer in the briefcase as my tired old legs do not move as fast as they used to.

  22. Jane believe me, you do not get through Duntroon if you are a “nutter”.”

    Well he seems like a nutter

    “But he says he is regretful of other inappropriate behaviour when he was at Duntroon Military College.

    The Herald Sun today said Mr Wilkie had forced his juniors to salute the 50th anniversary of Hitler’s rise to power while he was a senior cadet in 1983…………..But I have never made a secret of the fact that I was one of many cadets involved in the bastardisation scandal at the Royal Military College Duntroon. In fact I was disciplined for misconduct at the time………In his book Axis of Deceit, Mr Wilkie says he was a “larrikin” at Duntroon and set “some sort of record” for incurring punishments for offences such as “roughing up” anti-uranium protesters and “giving junior cadets a hard time……..Mr Etches was one of three cadets who blew the whistle on what he calls the college’s “sick secret cult” of sadistic punishment for trifling or imagined offences.

    The scandal led to the resignation of senior officers and the expulsion and disciplining of several cadets, including Wilkie, but he and most of his peers graduated to become career army officers.

    “Now he comes across as ‘Andrew Gandhi’ but back then he was scary and we were all wary of him,” Mr Etches told the Herald Sun.”

    Wilkie sounds like he was a nutjob in his youth.

  23. Is New Ltd lying about this??

    “In his book Axis of Deceit, Mr Wilkie says he was a “larrikin” at Duntroon and set “some sort of record” for incurring punishments for offences such as “roughing up” anti-uranium protesters and “giving junior cadets a hard time”

    Sounds like a person I should avoid

  24. Patricia, why weren’t the Coalition on ‘red alert’ over Peter Slipper ?

    My guess is that they really believed they could have an early election, where Mal Brough would be back in the parliament and Slipper would be long gone.

    They didn’t workshop all the possibilities because they were so sure of their
    own blarney.

    And for that may we all be truly thankful, amen 😀

  25. Min, it’s a fact that the male brain doesn’t mature until about the age of 25, especially the risk assessment factor.

    The female brain on the other hand matures at the age of 21 or 22.

    How old is Neil ??

  26. Miglo
    Can you get lycra for a septogenarion that can make him look like Abbort minus the ears, that would also go well with a treadle. I can just see myself furiously peddling away from the briefcase.

  27. Bilko, I believe you can get timers that tick away for ages. Should be a doddle if you get the nod. 😀

    Neil, he was a larrikin in his yoof when he was a member of the Young Thugerals. Now he’s middle aged and quite sedate, but still has some fire in his belly.

  28. Yep, Wilkie yet another Liberal the Liberals utterly screwed, this time Howard, by wanting honest and honourable people to lie and cheat for them. And when they refuse or buck their iron fist authoritarian Party rule then out come the hatchet jobs, the character assassinations and the destruction of careers.

    The Liberals sound like something I would want to avoid.

Leave a Comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s