Royal Blush?

Could Tony Abbott have predicted
A time he’d ever be conflicted
Twixt loyalties rightly his Queen’s
Or Crown Casino’s poker machines?

Asked that question about a year ago
He would for sure have answered, “No!”
But then hurt pride and thwarted ambition
Hadn’t goaded him into near sedition.

Wondering how to please James Packer,
He dreamed up what he thought a cracker
Of a stunt. A promo for strip poker!
He’d be hailed an Ace! Our own Oz Joker!

Front page pix of Tony Abbott’s arrest
Reveal much more than his hairy chest.
Notorious now as the ‘CHOGM gate crasher’
He’s certified; the world’s most famous flasher. 

Mad for power and media attention,
He broke every constitutional convention.
His defence?  He was irrational, confused,
Unaware Her Majesty was not amused.

Tony Abbott’s gatecrashing of  CHOGM for bi-lateral talks with leading figures like the British PM, David Cameron, and as well to give press conferences which upstaged the Prime Minister led to speculation at  Cafe Whispers and other sites like The Political Sword about other attention seeking stunts he might pull.  

Which got me thinking about his  prediction that he and the Liberal Party would rescind any legislation Julia Gillard’s government might pass on a mandatory pre-commitment scheme brought in to reduce problem gambling. 

This naturally enough had me wondering what the Leader of the Opposition could do to help his friend and political ally, James Packer who has been hurt and upset by accusations from leftie latte drinkers that his poker machines cause suffering to addicts!
Inevitably too it had me indulging in a bit of wishful thinking!   Wouldn’t it be wonderful if the political career of the Mad Monk was ended by one last stunt which went too far!  And one involving over exposure of that manly physique we’ve seen far too much of already!  What better defence could he offer for an act of gross indecency than that of another Liberal party politician who claimed confusion and irrationality when recently on trial for shop lifting and assault of a security guard.

22 comments on “Royal Blush?

  1. Delayed posting of this due to holding out in hope that Tony would indeed streak across the Queen’s line of vision today and make the Perth sausage sizzle truly memorable! .

    It was inspired of course by postings at the start of Chogm both on this site and at TPS about LOTO’s exhibitionism and crass behaviour in turning up and inserting himself into the proceedings – i.e. gatecrashing. Not hard to move from there to ‘flashing!’

  2. Very funny patricia, as usual. 🙂

    It seems passing strange that after more than a year of being bombarded with Abbott’s antics, the main stream media have gone quiet on the subject.

    The best they can come up with is that Abbott will be announcing alternative pokies policies “as early as next week”, and he will be meeting with Senator Xenophon to discuss pokie machine reform
    Senator Xenophon has had the same view for 14 years so this meeting may well not be to Abbott’s liking.

    Not even the most avid of Abbott’s media supporters could get him out of his latest bungled attempt at gate-crashing the CHOGM and so there is a brief respite….silence.

  3. Royal Blush?

    October 29, 2011 by patriciawa
    Pat. I read your blurb twice. Was there intended to be a point? I thought all you republicans would ignore the Royal antics. Gillard has become a token Royalist for CHOGM. This must be Royalist Julia. All we are missing now is Truthful Julia. We has had Real Julia, emotional Julia, wurrkka Julia, wurrkking Families Julia… Yes Truthful Julia might be interesting.
    I am a Royalist simply because an overseas Head of Government is harder to dick with. Imagine if Bill Shorten’s Mother In Law was the Queen and Head of State. I think the Windsor family suffers from a very shallow gene pool. Skipping Charles and Camilla. I can see more sound gene interaction when the royals marry into the peasant class.

  4. Pip, the truth is that the media cannot or will not report the negatine aspects of Mr. Abbott’s behaviour.

    The media, instead of reporting in this vein, has chosen to ignore him.

    Mr. Abbott has set out to undermine ChOGM and the country, to get at the PM. One bridge to far and inexcusable.

    His behaviour is not funny anymore.

    The look on the British PM and comments made by the Queen point to this.

    There is a time and place for politics. CHOGM is not one of them.

  5. Geoff, never at any time have the republicans attacked the Queen. They have been careful not to do this. They have always gave respect while she remains our head of state.

    I am not too sure who gets the biggest crowd in this country. Prince William or Queen Mary.

    In a couple of weeks, I predict will will see similar numbers in the street to great and cheer th American President. Does that mean we want to have him as our head of state. I believe not.

    Republicans have always respect the job the Queen is doing.

    This is not what it is about.

    It is about wanting our own head of state.

  6. I think catching His Crassness lurking outside David Cameron’s bedroom doing his Uriah Heap impersonations would be embarrassing enough for one CHOGM, don’t you?

    But I imagine he is vain and moronic enough to streak in front of HM. I understand she is quite a mimic and has no doubt been entertaining the family with her Liealot impersonations.

    She does a wonderful job, but we want to cut the apron strings and have our own head of state, which I believe she feels quite sympathetic to.

  7. Pip, I caught that one too that Abbott is going to come up with an alternative poker machine policy. I should imagine that this will be whatever Jamie Packer tells him should be his policy.

  8. Geoff re overseas Head of Government is harder to dick with Ya recon, better ask Charlie and Camilla about that one.. 🙄

    But seriously, you obviously have not one single clue about Australia’s Constitution nor the Australia Act 1986 (Cth).

  9. “I should imagine that this will be whatever Jamie Packer tells him should be his policy.”

    “Look Tones, I can call you Tones can’t I we are good mates after all, well look Tones how about you give us a few billion of all the tax payers money you are raking in and we in the gambling industry will make sure it goes to expanding our…. I mean we will make sure it goes to helping those poor unfortunate problem gamblers by making our gambling even more addictive, putting in more machines and venues, and spending it on advertising praising you and encouraging more gambling.

    Oh and while where at it Tones mate, there is that pesky ABC that need to be got rid of, we can take that off your hands and then there are those unions believe it or not asking for more money and conditions for their workers. We need that money for out 200% pay rises every year you know. So WorkChoices would be good, sooner rather than later mate.

    What you are $100 billion in the red and rapidly increasing. No problems Tones, just cut all corporate taxes, get rid of fees and charges, slash workers wages and conditions through WorkChoices and we promise you Tones we will pour that windfall back into the economy giving you more tax revenue. It’s called trickle down economics and works like a charm. Don’t look at America, they were a basket case because of Bush/Clinton/Bush/Obama, nothing to do with them giving trillions to the wealthy. The wealthy did everything they could to help the country there but were cobbled by the government not giving them enough tax payers money.

    So Tones when can I expect the first few billion to be transferred to my Cayman Islands account?

  10. Are CHOGMs held every year? If so, I can see Abbott jetting off to the next one for more bilateral talks. Anything to upstage the true PM.

  11. Tony Abbott reminds me of that serious pest from some years ago, the name of whom escapes me.

    What will be his next stunt? Run onto the court of the final of the Australian Open? Streak across the MCG during a test match? Wander onto the race track during the Melbourne Cup?

  12. Miglo

    the xmas parades will be on soon. perhaps a “dopey” outfit or a “lonely ” elf.

    still your image of thunderous horses charging at the Melburne cup would be good, but remember no pairs allowed.

  13. Perhaps he’ll lead the Adelaide Christmas Pageant, or even sit alongside Santa.

    And naturally he’ll have bilateral talks with Obama. Perhaps he’ll spring him as he hops off the plane.

  14. Springing Obama, please, please. please. It would be great to see the Secret service guys Take Him Down

    i may have watched a few too many american movies.

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