Are you like me, can’t start the day without caffeine as well as an adrenaline shot here at Cafe Whispers and then a trip to The Political Sword to read any new post and comments there as well as following up on LYNS-DAILY-LINKS. So there’s plenty to think about as I get on with the routine of daily life. Sometimes it’s more than just thinking. It’s soul searching, which I found with Ad Astra’s article challenging us to question our moral values when judging others, particularly politicians. There’s been a lot of name calling, moralising and finger pointing at Julia Gillard and her government lately. I found myself amongst a lot of serious comment on that post and found it heavy going and challenging, though worth while too.
At one stage I had to retreat into a bit of light relief by composing one of my ‘pomes’ and doing some research on the web about compasses* in general. I also got a lift from Mr. Denmore at The Failed Estate. He makes me think and smile too. His latest brilliant satire on the way the Murdoch media has been ‘stitching up’ Julia Gillard and her government with angling, exaggerations and surmising shows how journos these days will make a mountain out of a molehill and invent a story about almost anything. As if rumors and leaks and innuendos weren’t enough we get body language interpreted. We’ve just been discussing that here with Min’s latest post on leadership.
So I used the ideas suggested by Min, Ad Astra and Mr. Denmore to come up with a ‘story’ of my own. I’ve illustrated it with a picture of HMS Sirius, flagship of The First Fleet, bringing the first settlers to Australia. Please note it is flying a red flag! Was that an omen for the future? I imagined what might happen if we really did keep the compass from that historic ship symbolically stored in the Lodge. Then the key to that all important cellar was rumored to be lost by the PM! Typical of a woman to lose the key! But what if it was a stich up of the kind Mr. Denmore has so ably illustrated? Who was really to blame?
I’ve put it in a ‘pome’ but it’s as likely a story as any The Australian could carry. Remember the Godwin Grech email? Who would have believed that? It really happened. Can anyone think of a headline a journo might dream up if he had a whiff of that rumor about the lost key? What’s the angle? Had a disgruntled member of the household staff at the Lodge filched it to make trouble? Maybe the First Bloke had it in a vise in his shed making a souvenir copy? Was Tony Abbott really there in his fireman’s gear? Or was he framed? Perhaps it was just another publicity stunt to show off his pecs? Any alternative headlines to mine?
Australia’s Moral Compass Lost By Prime Minister?
The Australian government looked star crossed,
When the nation’s moral compass* had seemed lost.
A secure lock at the official residence
Of the Prime Minister had long made sense.
It stayed safe in the cellar in its binnacle,
While up above the country reached the pinnacle
Of achievement in women’s liberation
With its first female leader of the nation.
Then the story broke. Reporters crowded round.
Was it true the ship of state had run aground?
Or gone off course? Were many lost at sea?
How had Julia Gillard mislaid the sacred key?
There had been leaks, anonymous phone calls,
Rumours that the strange phrase ‘Kelvin’s Balls’
Had so alarmed the PM, it seemed, she’d had it hid.
No one confirmed that though, not for a thousand quid.
Suddenly a noisy clamor from below
Revealed Tony Abbott! Wouldn’t you know!
He’d broken in, wielding his fireman’s axe.
Said he’d had to, to clarify some facts.
He lifted high the two brass monkeys sitting there,
Waved them aloft in the media glare,
Pointing out that they were frozen solid,
Proving global warming theory quite invalid!
His home invasion had paid off! He thought he’d won!
But Julia arrested him, brought him undone.
Like Guy Fawkes he’d been caught red handed.
Tried for treason, he was as traitor branded.
His defence? A man should steer the ship of state,
With his wife as First Lady, not First Mate!
Finally the judge’s ruling he could not dodge.
He’d never have the Captain’s quarters at The Lodge.
Julia Gillard at the trial eyeballed him,
Her hand on the arm of her partner, Tim,
“Tony, I called you ‘Mate’ once as a joke.
Now here’s my real mate, Australia’s first First Bloke.”
* In the 18th and 19th centuries a ship’s compass was always kept in the binnacle along with the Kelvin Spheres, two iron balls to offset magnetic shifts. These iron balls, mounted on brass arms, sitting on either side of the ship’s binnacle gave rise to the term ‘brass monkey’ and the now well known description of extremes of cold which could freeze its balls off.