The Antipodean Budget Reply Process

Friday, May 11, 2012.

Our Antipodean Budget Process
Has rules as in the game of chess.
Tradition says he must make The Reply.
Can Tony do it and not tell a lie?

Could he perhaps have more success
By starting his speech with,  “I confess
That unlike Swannie I’m no Grand Master.”
That might help him avoid disaster.

A compliment or two would show finesse,
Would help his image in the press.
But,  no Chancellor of the Exchequer,
He decides instead to be a wrecker.

Aussies just don’t care for politesse.
He knows that!  The best way to impress?
To shout and carry on about that tax!
It hurts us all!  Who cares about the facts?

This was also a chance for him to obsess
About scandals and slime and Labor’s excess.
Slipper and Thomson!  They’ve helped by stealth,
To destroy Australia and steal our wealth!

His reply speech worked,  but nevertheless
Tony did regret the need for full day dress.
News offered help with their number jugglers.
If he could only’ve worn his budget speech smugglers!

* Acknowledgement to Alan Moir for permission to use his hilarious,  but oh so apt,  interpretation of Tony Abbott’s Delivery of his Speech in Reply.  http://www.smh.com.au/photogallery/opinion/cartoons/alan-moir-20090907-fdxk.html?selectedImage=0
 
NOTES:   Last night’s Budget Reply Speech from Tony Abbott left me dumbfounded.  I went to various other sites and found a silence which I think spoke of the same wordless horror that I felt.   An act of contempt had been performed on our public stage.   Other people clearly felt something similar.   No one had much to say.   I usually deal with my rage at Abbott’s excesses with a bit of light verse and part of me regretted that I had already used the metaphor of Budget Smugglers and published it here,  since I just did not want to write anything new about Tony Abbott at all.     
 
Then this morning I woke up to find that Alan Moir, as so often,  had said it all for me.  This time the metaphor was chess, and when it comes to running our country’s economy, then Wayne Swann is a Grand Master.   Tony Abbott doesn’t stand a chance against the World’s Best Treasurer.  And he knows it.   And doesn’t it make him mad!